I so don’t want to die

There I was
a calf
and half
of me
knew its the end
one half was hoping somehow
I could perhaps transcend
I’d heard my friends all screaming
panting, groaning, they
had gone in just before me
and this was not passing away
this was murder
this was awful
this was terror
this was pain
I’d spent all my life
in that fucking cage
had gone insane
no milk from my mother
just that slop
that’s all
which made me weak from the neck
down
and the shits too as a rule
and nothing makes one shit more
than knowing you are going to die
knowing those bloody butchers
and going to fucking try
and slash your throat
and trachea
this is the end for me
I’m going to feel the adrenaline
that’s how it has to be
and I hope it permeates my flesh
and gets inside of thee
and gives you all the ab dabs
makes you fear a lot
makes you know the terror
cos a lot of it I got
and when it gets inside of you
and sickens you tool bad
I’ve given up my life for you
and I can’t say that I’m sad