Heyghoge

I be the hedgerow rover
A spiny fellow who
Frequents the thorny
Hazels and the berried holly too
I am pretty slow at running
Dreaming is my thing
Nocturnally I get about
To the countryside I bring

A ball of spines occasionally
When I do my thing
When I get a bit frightened
That is when I bring
My lifelessness and languor
My immobility
I’m suspended in abeyance
Its my kind of dormancy

My enemy the Badger
His storminess for me
He can get real tyrannical
Like an incendiary
We go for similar food we do
And I best let him be
For me and him just dont exist
In the same place thankfully

On the beady eyes we worry
The owls can sometimes be
Up there on a bough somewhere
An overhanging tree
And that can cause us stress of course
For when they swoop and fly
Its done in total silence
Which is clearly why

We have to have our wits about us
When we are out at night
Looking for sufficient cover
When the slayers are in sight
Insects protein rich
Snails and frogs and toads
And birds eggs we can pitch
In
but try to keep off the roads
Not forgetting Berries too
So we are quite omniverous
In what we all now do

Some of us like hibernating
When the weathers cold
Its good to get into a den
On sleeping we are sold
We drop our temperature down a bit
And demonstrate our way
Of feeling rather comfortable
And younger even every day

We like the taste of fatty foods
Insects can be great
But our livers can get fatty
So we have to contemplate
More grassy roots and mushrooms
For cancer is a thing
That can really creep up on us
And actually do us in

We are prone to obesity
Fat and sugar we
Dont move about that much
And like to eat too much you see
Its not just human beings
Its hedgehogs too alas
We also get run over
And do run out of gas

And we are inquisitive
So discarded tubes and pipes
We like to get our heads stuck in them
Then we get the gripes
And we can pass ringworm
Onto humans who
Dont much like that problem
Which we know is true

As to reproduction
We are born blind and we
Can have as many as 6 babies
So a mother has to be
Good with kids and on the ball
The quills soon dry and we
Just have to really learn the ropes
Re predation, constantly

The Romani’s still eat us
So that can be a pain
Boiled or roasted
Really that idea is insane
In other places far away
They make medicine out of us
And Mrs Tiggy Winkle was a hedgehog
So the fuss

Really about hedgehogs
Is that we are hushed and calm
We kind of grunt or snuffle
Otherwise we come to harm
In The murkiness and twilight
At sunset often we
Snuckle down in silence
In the litter by a tree

Concealed in shadowy mystery
Unnoticed by you
We disappear we hideaway
Lie low yes we do
We mosey around and dip into
And Eavesdrop when we can
We are sensitive and thoughtful
And live to a kind of plan

We can live up to seven years
Which in hedgehog speak is great
Diet plays a big part
In longevity and fate
Staying away from BROCK
And FOXES clearly helps us be
More sage like in our thinking
And our reality