{"id":3349,"date":"2012-09-29T18:40:41","date_gmt":"2012-09-29T18:40:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/?p=3349"},"modified":"2012-09-29T23:16:24","modified_gmt":"2012-09-29T23:16:24","slug":"captains-own-story","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/2012\/09\/captains-own-story\/","title":{"rendered":"Captain’s own story"},"content":{"rendered":"

I’m Captain
\nwell that’s what they’ve
\ncalled me
\nI lived with this bloke
\nwho was mad
\nhe’d run about shouting
\nexpletives
\nfor clearly he thought
\nthat I had
\ntaken too much
\nof his leisure
\nhe was always
\ncursing at me
\nchucking house bricks
\nout the window
\nwith his boot
\nin my face constantly<\/p>\n

look at my eye
\nits been cut several times
\ndespite being friendly, I get
\neverything thrown at me
\nwhen he gets drunk
\nand that’s why he’s always
\nin debt
\nthe other day, he was so awful
\nhe threw a hot teapot at me
\nhe got me by the neck
\npushed me into his car
\ndrove me down to the dump
\nrapidly
\nhe had this old blanket
\nhe wrapped me in and
\nchucked me yea up in the air
\nI came down among all
\nthose vile plastic bags
\nKitislano the place
\nI did share<\/p>\n

the sun, it was hot
\nI was feeling forlorn
\nno water no nothing to drink
\nI felt this bad pain
\nin the side of my body
\nand both of my eyes
\nthey did blink
\nloads of small maggots
\nall over the place
\nand a dead rat
\nwas close to where, I
\nhad landed,
\nit was, it was horrible there
\nand I guessed
\nhe was hoping I’d die<\/p>\n

I recalled I was trained
\nby the SPCA
\nI was to tackle
\nthose who
\ntransgressed
\nstop them and catch them in some way
\nactually I had felt blessed
\nbut they said, I was just too friendly
\nso one dark and horrible day
\nI ended up, with my master
\nan excitable sod anyway
\nwho drank lots and smoked lots
\nand swore lots
\nand thought of himself
\nas some God
\nas Gods gift he said to all women
\nthey found him so charming
\nhe said
\nhow many would find him as charming?
\ntreating me like this
\nmy head<\/p>\n

was burning
\nmy body was shaking
\nand into what was a grand place
\nwith, silk lined, kennels
\nall white and majestic
\nand plenty of real honest grace
\nclearly with angels now flying about
\nI was dead, it just had to be so
\nand what will become of that brute of man
\nwho beat me and forced me to go
\nI just hope he gets his come
\nup pence
\nand they put that sad bastard away
\nfor leaving me in the sick dumpster
\nI just really hope he does pay<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“Captains” last day on Planet Earth found in a filthy dumpster 18\/7\/2012 died the following day age 2 years in Vancouver Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3349","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-animal-rights"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3349","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3349"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3349\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3351,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3349\/revisions\/3351"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3349"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3349"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3349"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}