{"id":166,"date":"2011-11-14T21:51:50","date_gmt":"2011-11-14T21:51:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/?p=166"},"modified":"2011-12-12T20:07:39","modified_gmt":"2011-12-12T20:07:39","slug":"realisation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/2011\/11\/realisation\/","title":{"rendered":"Realisation"},"content":{"rendered":"
Its hard to explain the realisation of becoming a nuisance, alas
\nIt can come with old age, its not something to gauge, it just seems to creep up enmasse
\nAnd what can be done to reverse it?
\nNot really a lot I can say
\nSympathy comes in short measure and besides there’s no positive wayWhen your able to stay on the treadmill and be part of the rat race, then you
\nAre accepted, for whatever reason, but if that breaks down then the view
\nis you are becoming a nuisance
\nAnd long term, a pain in the arse
\nBeing chronically ill is the bitterest pill
\nA relationship buster 1st Class!The Sufferer suffers the pain of it all
\nThe boredom, the tedious hours
\nLearns to appreciate the tiniest things
\nAnd tries to fight shy of all rows
\nThe Carer is stressed for the Sufferer
\nAnd takes on the sufferers woe
\nBut can’t undestand all the jargon
\nAnd suffers as well, as we know<\/p>\n

Its the pangs and the wilder distractions
\nIts the crippling flow of the pain
\nIts the time that is siphoned off, pre allocations, which cannot be made up again
\nAnd then of course realisation we’re all on our own, in the end!
\nThe meaning of life doesn’t come back to dwell on our minds it goes foward to send<\/p>\n

Messages out to the Universe, where the energies rampant and strong
\nWe have to protect ourselves now we are vulnerable
\nNot die at the hands of the throng
\nIts easy to cry in the morning
\nTo wash the sleep out of one’s eyes
\nIts good if we sing in the morning
\nFor then our opponents big eyes<\/p>\n

May pick up a daunting proposal
\nAnd shake it for all that its worth
\nBut the simple unending example
\nPut bitterness first before mirth
\nSelf pity the ditty we keep to ourselves
\nin the layers of mind we possess
\nWe must appear normal whatever our problem
\nAnd fight off the heaviest stress<\/p>\n

The puzzle is how we attracted, a disease like the dreaded RA
\nThat leaves you in hock to the Doctors
\nWho cannot, cure you, anyway
\nSo there isnt a case, that much you know
\nBut your Carers continue to say
\nGo through the motions of excercising
\nForget
\nand the pain goes away<\/p>\n

Its not true its with you forever
\nIts just you have chosen to try
\nAnd file it away, hoping some day
\nyou may lose it, we do by and by
\ninflammation why is its creation?
\nAnd why should it look back on you
\nReally its no consolation
\nIts something you have to get through<\/p>\n

Its all got this far and you are where you are
\nOn the outskirts of boredom and pain
\nWith your stress levels high its seems easy to cry
\nA release valve that may keep you sane
\nIts important to do it away from the gaze
\nPick a quiet place on your own
\nIf anyone asks say that your getting better
\nAnd on no account ever moan<\/p>\n

No matter how sorry, how sick or in pain
\nYou are what you always must do
\nHead up, smile, say you feel well on the way
\nThen people will try to help you
\nYou will go, through bouts of depression
\nYou must mull these things in your mind
\nYou will recall negative bits of your days
\nAnd lots of bits sadly you’ll find<\/p>\n

You will suffer the people around you
\nwhose natural appeal is that they
\nWill say go and excercise – soon you’ll be better
\nBut you know this isn’t the way
\nTorture yourself go on pacing for that will encourage those who
\nHave shown an interest and you may just suffer
\nBut suffer in silence will you<\/p>\n

You are in training to give the appearence
\nthat everyday jobs are a breeze
\nThe fact that they’re not never harp on a lot
\nIn your privacy thats when you seize
\nBack the initiative somehow, talk yourself through it, you’ll cry
\nBemoaning the world, what it has done for you
\nand the questions is why why why why?<\/p>\n

But it is your start, to your new way of life
\nAnd there are new lessons to learn
\nYou can’t be an Olympic Boxer no more
\nSo let someone else have their turn
\nFill what is left of your life
\nWith meaningful thought till you know
\nThat God in his infinite wisdom
\nHas sent for you and you must go<\/p>\n

Till then battle on try to understand more
\nof what life’s about and no doubt
\nYou will experience suffering, but that in itself is your out
\nYou must learn to smile through it, don’t let them know
\nTell them your well thats the way
\nThe moment you let on your bloody well ill
\nIs the time that they all run away
\n<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When I was first diagnosed, I felt like giving up, why me? what had I done to deserve this awful problem, now facing me it mattered not, I decided I had always been a fairly slow Hare, now I was going to be one of the fastest tortoises, and that’s how I new see it,.and that keeps me going forward if a little slower each day Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,83],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-166","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poems","category-trials-and-tribulations-of-an-ongoing-illness"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/166","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=166"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/166\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":168,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/166\/revisions\/168"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=166"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=166"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cooksdelight.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=166"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}